Most of the time I feel like I’m able to balance my breathing with general living. I may have to avoid going places or participating in certain things, but with the exception of flare ups, I like to think I do an ok job. This summer has been the exception. I was doing pretty well this past winter and spring until May. Since then everything has been a bit of a blur. I haven’t been to work in weeks and I’m also taking an online class at the moment.
I haven’t “been to school” for almost 10 years so while it’s a little bit of a culture shock getting back into the groove of things, it’s also not too bad because I don’t have to physically show up to class somewhere. Most of the time this entails logging into the course management system at the beginning of the week to find out what discussion questions I want to answer, and then coming back later in the week to respond to my classmates. Now that we’re into the semester there are more substantial assignments due, like the paper I’m getting close to being a week late on turning in. I didn’t actually get a late start on the thing, I had my topic and key points figured out and found 20 peer-reviewed academic articles to use as sources when I was only required to have 5. I of course had grandiose plans to knock it out on the way to Pittsburgh and while I was there, but that obviously didn’t happen.
I think one of the reasons I’ve been having trouble making significant progress is the discussion questions don’t take a whole lot of brain power for me to answer. I read the chapter(s) from the required textbooks, check out the question, think about it, re-skim a section or two of the text and type away. Writing this paper is requiring some higher-level brain function which doesn’t play well with my short attention span due to:
- Constantly wishing I was lying down instead of sitting up
- My oxygen saturation levels dropping whenever I’m up and moving around
- Watching the clock to make sure I don’t wait too long before taking my next dose of meds
- Is this a…what day is this?
Trying to work on the paper in Pittsburgh was almost laughable because all day every day my body was being stressed out doing what I like to call respiratory acrobatics. Even if someone didn’t have trouble breathing, I think a normal person would be worn out from all the huffing/puffing, inhaling/exhaling, breath-holding and what have you. To top it all off, I had to refrain from taking most of the maintenance medications that keep me going day after day. Then every time they degraded my breathing to the pre-established stopping point, I’d be pumped full of rescue medication that gets me back to an acceptable level but also comes with a list of side effects that aren’t conducive to critical thinking. I was telling my friend Steve I was in a constant state of sweaty or extra sweaty the whole time. Even after we were finished at the hospital for the day I continued feeling like I was still in a constant state of “cool down” into the evening.
The good news is I’m still slowly getting better. I was given the option to start tapering my prednisone early but decided to finish out my current dose before dropping down. It was a good decision because just going to the grocery store with Liz yesterday and walking up and down a few isles left me sweaty, worn out, and having some serious trouble getting to sleep last night. Even now, I’ve been lying down for the past 20min, my resting heart rate is over 100 and my O2 is 93-95% which is better than sitting up or moving around. I’m about halfway done with this paper and am hoping to wrap it up tonight or tomorrow. I’m guessing I should probably get my in-house composition expert to check it out before I turn it in.